sat through a sales presentation. weird being on the other side of the desk. the presenter had two bats in his proverbial cave … that’s right … BOOGERS in his snout. one blew out and almost landed on me. could have died

saw a pair today. awesome

okay, so remember in Bugs Bunny cartoons when there was a big, slobbering guy who said “I’m going to love him and squeeze him and call him George?” some journalist made the same statement yesterday, quoting Bugs, in reference to the Royal Baby. I mentioned it to my smartass husband and he was like, you know where that’s from, right? I was like, yes, Bugs. he was like, um, no, “Of Mice and Men.” I was like, duh. how dumb am I? a re-read is in order

and really the only good part was Sophia calling me to tell me that she’d lost her first tooth.

I have the idea and bare bones for a book. It makes me feel sad, delicate, exposed and exhilarated all at the same time.

Are you thrice divorced? Do you neglect to clean the area between your crotch and legs? Do you live in a van down by the river? Then maybe you’ve got what it takes to be a motivational speaker!

what I allow is what will continue

deal of the day. American wanted $100 for my now 66 lb bag. I was like, really? even for elite? he was like well, are you first? I said, I’m on the list, but it hasn’t cleared. I then asked if we could go inside (I was at the curb) and inquire about paying for an upgrade. He was like, good idea! He prints my boarding passes … I was already in first. he was so excited that he didn’t have to charge me. It was stellar.

squiggly nasty