after seeing Adam Levine again tonight, I totally know how those girls felt about Elvis and the Beatles

Last Sunday, Lola poked her eye on her favorite jasmine bush in the backyard.  She has built herself a little den like she’s homeless.  Anyway, I took her to the vet last Monday and today because of said injury.

She’ll be okay, but it’s going to take a while to heal.  So, this was my solution.  She may be calling doggie protective services on me.  It’s this or the cone.

am i an idiot? did north dakota fix its state constitutional issues last november and i just live in an alternate universe? is it now a state? will i ever read beyond the headlines?

from 3/1/13 … forgot to post … day was so dramatic…

“I had to fly southwest today as I’m going in and out of Oakland. I am going to fucking vomit. I sat in the window exit and two assholes sat next to me. Not a full flight. She is totally made up and reeks. He ditched her boyfriend, by accident, and she keeps chattering about how they’re not going to let him board with all of those bags. they did and he looks like he’s going to kill her … btw, she’s been using the word terrorist like it’s water. He’s reading sports illustrated and he keeps interrupting him to ask him “who wore it better” as seen in her in In Touch magazine. holy fuckballs. this is horrifying.”

so, outside of Baker, California, there is a mileage sign advising how far it is to SLC and Vegas. the value after Salt Lake has been updated; the green sign colors don’t match. it’s obvious at 90 mph, so someone at CalTrans needs to get a Pantone book. anyway, the value is now 510. did SLC move????

So, is Boron where Borax and the mules come from? And isn’t that soap? I was driving on the 58 between Mojave and Barstow today and noticed all of these references to the unless and soap and a town that rhymes with moron. Curious

I’m gonna have to borrow this from Garth Brooks … “Oh the stories we could tell if it weren’t for the code of the road.” How fucking true

I gotta get out of town. I’m slowly going insane. I am taking a Thelma and Louise trip. Sans the Louise and sans the dramatic, suicidal ending. But I am hoping for Brad Pitt. 💜d him pre-Jolie.

LAX to CDG via ICELAND.

leaves a week from tomorrow.

$5,612.

i wish i had the balls to fucking book it and just go.